O Victory in Jesus

Be sober-minded; be watchful. Your adversary the devil prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour. I Peter 5:8

 I let my guard down. I got too busy, too tired, too weary of the bleak gray skies of early spring. Soggy spring sapped my soul. And I didn't even realize it. Until yesterday. Life has been clipping along, without many hiccups. We are all waiting in wonder as we see what the Lord has continued to unfold in our road. But I let my guard down and fell headlong into a pothole.

 I don't enjoy going to the doctor, but it never bothers me much either (okay, except for the fact they insist upon weighing you every time, even if you are there for a hang nail). The appointment yesterday was simple: it was just a consultation for a pre-transfer D & C in a few weeks. My doctor said, "You seem nervous." At that moment-- and not until that moment-- I realized he was right. I said some embarrassingly stupid and awkward things before and after the admission. This was a bit of a new phenomenon for me. 

What I couldn't articulate at the time swamped me on the short drive home. The extent of the "D" in D & C is double the normal procedure, which will make monitoring during pregnancy more crucial: I'm already guarded about this pregnancy and this new news added to my sensitivity. Tim will be out of town the week of procedure and I realized how desperately I want him there. I'm apprehensive about any anesthesia: I've had some bad experiences. By the time my two mile drive was done, I, too, was done. 

 Tim walked in the door after a week of travel, and I greeted him by being paralyzed emotionally, even physically. I didn't want to be home, yet I didn't want to go anywhere either. I wanted something to do, yet I wanted to do nothing. Tim worried: I was in a bad place and we both knew it. I just didn't know what to do about it.

My gracious husband knew the remedy, it works every time. He sent me to my dad's so I could get a walk through the woods with my Loving Savior. The walk would happen in the morning. When I arrived, I donned my pajamas and spent a lazy night on the couch while downing the Mushroom and Swiss burger I bought at the DQ drive-thru: that oughtta help me feel better about my unmotivated self! Good grief! And grief it was: I laid my case before the Lord as I realized that Satan had pounced from my blindside and had me by the throat.

Be sober-minded; be watchful. Your adversary the devil prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour.

Satan is like a lion, he is not a lion. He is no match for the Lion of Judah. The Mighty Conqueror swept in to save me. I loudly sang "Victory in Jesus" while praising the Lion in my midst. 

A timely reminder to all of us to be alert to the spiritual battle that is at all times around us, though unseen. A reminder that we are to "be strong in the Lord and in the strength of his might. Put on the whole armor of God, that you may be able to stand against the schemes of the devil. For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the cosmic powers over this present darkness, against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly places. Therefore take up the whole armor of God, that you may be able to withstand in the evil day, and having done all, to stand firm." Ephesians 6

And, we are more than conquerors through Christ Jesus (Romans 8: 37).

Be watchful. Stay awake. Be ready. Conquer through Christ.

Choosing an Ellis

Wednesday, March 1 15:00 CST. I just finished T25 with Shawn T. I had enough time to shower and get to church on time (assuming my hair wouldn't be thrown back into another pony tail). Tim skips in: "We have profiles." Accompanying the announcement was the urging look that spoke, "you need to come out to my office now and we are going to look. Oh, yeah, now." And "now" was when I wanted to come. My shower was swift, my hands excitedly shaky as I attempted any chance of making up my face, and I ran out minutes later with a wet head.

Tim's screen was full of pdf's ready to view. PDF's at this point meant "Pretty Dumb Founding" and oh, so exciting. These weren't just pdf's. These files represented life waiting to be nurtured and birthed. One to two of these files contained a life we cannot wait to nurture, grow in utero and introduce to the world as the newest Ellis. How incredible is that?

On Wednesday, I thought I was leaning one direction, and was surprised-- excitedly so-- at God's answer yesterday. As we reached out for prayer during our review, a wonderful sister friend texted "Praying for God to place His hands on your baby and for you to hear Him." He did and we did. God's hands are on our baby (babies?) and we know in His hands are strength, protection, peace, love and comfort for our child/ren.

In His hands are strength, protection, peace, love and comfort for us.

His hands are strength, protection, peace, love and comfort for you. No matter what season you find yourself in today. By surrender, place yourself in His hands and let Him mold you and hold you.

God's love and the peace of Jesus accompanied by the fire of the Holy Spirit to you all.

You hem me in behind and before, and you lay your hand upon me.
Such knowledge is too wonderful for me, too lofty for me to attain.
Psalm 139: 5-6